The World As Mare Sees It...
Behemoth a comin' 2002-12-23

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Operation Mini-Skirt Status: -43.8 lbs.
Mood: I'm at work, and I'm not supposed to be... my work ethic is starting to prod rather uncomfortably at my bottom.

I obviously can't be left alone in a room for long because, very much like a toddler, as soon as no one is watching, I start to shove whatever will fit into my mouth. It's easier to say no to food when someone is offering, than when no one is looking.

* * *

On the bright side, I bought a Hottie Dress yesterday for a ridiculously small amount of money. Going to wear it on New Years, going to be very happy. It's a dress unlike anything I've ever owned before. I feel like Mira Sorvino in it, because it makes my legs start at my hips and end somewhere across the street. I feel willowy and blond in it, despite my dark alterna-pixie cut and the fact that I can't claim more than four and three quarter inches above five feet.

As long as I'm not left alone for long, I will continue to feel magical in this dress. If I'm not careful though, this lovely garment will look like a Band-Aid on my fat and bloated body. Mothers will cover their children's eyes, and scream "BEHEMOTH IN A MINI!" when I come too close...

* * *

I opened my first Christmas gifts yesterday. Mandy's little sister gave me the sweetest little basket, and the yummiest lip gloss, which is lovely, because I can taste it all day long without cheating on my diet. (If I'm not alone in a room, that is. Otherwise, I'm liable to eat the gloss, plastic turny-thing and all.)
Mandy's mother gave me a very pretty sculpture that she got for me in Michigan, almost 3 months ago. It's always flattering to be considered for Christmas so early.
Mandy gave me the newest Santana CD, which I've been craving with my very soul... except for that Michelle Branch song, because if I hear it one more time on the radio, I'm going to sprinkle arsenic in my own espresso and drink it happily with pointed pinky. Anyway, yeah, Santana, which I've wanted forever. And Pearl Jam, the second album with Jeremy and Black on it. This is a funny story, actually. Mandy and I were lounging around my back yard one summer long weekend this year, listening to the top 103 rock songs of all time on 103 FM, a radio station in Toronto. In the top 15 alone, there were 4 songs I loved, all from that album, but I had no idea they were from Pearl Jam. See, I'm not a Pearl Jam kinda girl. Nuh uh. Not even close. I'm a Tom Jones kinda girl. I'm a Sinatra kinda girl. I'm an Abba/BeeGees/Madonna kinda girl. I'm not a Pearl Jam kinda girl. But damn if I don't adore like, a good 50% of this album. So, that's why Mandy got me Pearl Jam. Apparantly, they're my new favourite band. And she gave me a pair of socks, which made me laugh, as I opened them just as she was opening the pair of socks I have her. Finally, she gave me the cutest top from Old Navy, which made me very happy because the label said Medium/Moyen, and there ain't nothin' in life I can ask for, more than that.

I gave her Big Shiny Tunes 7, which was to be expected because I've previously given her 6 and 5. I gave her the socks, but that was no surprise, because, like Big Shiny, I must give my best friend socks for Christmas. And I gave her a coffee maker, which will go in her new basement apartment once she moves into it. That last item is particularly symbolic, as our friendship is held together not by blood, and certainly not water, (only sometimes by booze) but most definitely by coffee.
Plus, she needed one.

And that's it for today, my lovelies. I was inspired by Paul (who was inspired by Bren , who was inspired by Kaitlin ) to make a To Do List for 2003, so that's what I'll do tomorrow. Just let me put it on my To Do list�

Mwa!

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iimage: Jack Vettriano