The World As Mare Sees It...
The One Where I Show My Brains. 2003-11-21










Let's get to the important parts first, yes? I look cute today. I've got a cool Chloey Sevigney in The Last Days of Disco thing going on... except, I'm not blond, beautiful or waif-like. Also, I'm not wearing anything even remotely Halston-like. And yet, and yet, I still have it going on! My hair is doing it's own little dance competition hustle, and my makeup was applied by the ghosts of 1977 one-hit wonders. And I'm wearing flares. (Flares, by the way, that were causing internal bleeding a month ago. But today? I took a deep breath after they were buttoned, thankyouverymuch!) It all works, I'm telling you. Doubters be gone. Y'all know I know what I'm talking about.

So, ok, check this out.
My printer died, right? I got it five years ago, which is positively ancient in the world of computery-type things. This suits me fine, because I never like to be anywhere near the head of the game when it comes to technology. Let them work out the bugs first, I say! Case in point? I still load real, honest-to-goodness film into a banged-up camera, which means I still get to experience the joyful anticipation of going to the shop to pick up my pictures. Oh, I know; the newfangled digital whosits can let you do that too... but, but... yeah. Shut up. I'm afraid of them. Leave me alone.

Where was I going with this? Right, printer. It's old; it died; there's no point in fixing it. Obviously, the thing to do is buy a new one, which is an easy task for someone who knows their USB port from their hindquarters. I, unfortunately, do not. I thought USB was a university, or perhaps a new dirty television channel.

Now, my original plan was to do no research whatsoever, go to one of those computery stores, and buy whatever Oily Salesman in Coloured Jacket tells me to buy. Honestly, the idea of looking at websites, comparing inkjets to lasers, and learning the intricacies of 1200 optimised dpi and ppm rates... yeah... No. Seriously poppets, the whole notion, for me, is akin to cruel and unusual forms of torture. Ugh.

But then! But then! Oh, I've got me a hero, poppets. All I said to Tim was, "So, I need a new printer. What do you think I should get?" And the next thing I know, I've got graphs and prices and real advice in total layman's terms. (Because I'm that stupid when it comes to this stuff, poppets, and much prefer the word thingy to anything remotely technical like... cartridge or something!) The doll even looked up local retailers for me, and gave me phone numbers and everything. Oh, and OH! He totally understood my need to have a printer that colour co-ordinated with my scanner. Ok? OK?! Because that's important, poppets! It so is!

So then, you know what I did? I called one of those big scary stores! And I asked them if they have the HP SoAndSo Inkjettywhosits, and they did! And I'm going to pick it up tonight and I'm spending exactly HALF of what I thought I was going to spend, so take that Mr. Oily Salesman in Coloured Jacket! Ha! Ha HA!

Gonna get a new pret-ty print-ter! Gonna get a new pret-ty print-ter! Whee!

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In other news, my throat still hurts, because the other night I was eating seafood risotto for dinner, and I accidentally swallowed a shrimp tail. Yeah. I apparently also need a dinner-time version of Tim the Hero, to be on-hand for possible Heimlich necessities.

* * *

Have a lovely weekend, poppets. Lay a kiss on someone, and enjoy the hell out of it!

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Beyond Our Borders
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Check In - 2011-03-25
Ain't love grand? - 2010-07-26
Airing things out - 2010-02-22
Wierd. - 2010-02-19
Same old same old (arse) - 2010-02-16

iimage: Jack Vettriano